Vomit

"U2-charist": Bono moves in mysterious ways Entertainment Entertainment News Reuters.com

Seriously, I don't think I really need to add much commentary. I can kind of understand it when some small independent protestant church sings U2 in their services...and youth groups can be excused for just not knowing any better...but seriously, this is the official church of England?!?

I think in an effort to incorporate all things truly British into the Anglican church they should pull up the carpet in the sanctuary and put down AstroTurf with football (soccer) markings on it. Many American churches already have concession stands in the foyer. Personally I think "concession" might have dual meaning. Maybe some anti-trendy emergent pastor could write a sermon about how selling coffee in the lobby of the church is a "concession stand" (like in the pro sports arena context) and they are also "concession" "stands" (meaning they've "conceded" to the secular culture of merchandising and selling people things they don't need and that's a poor message to "stand" for).

If it wasn't so cynical I think some mainstream pastors might actually use that idea. If it wasn't so cheesy some emergent pastors might use that idea. Oh well. The religiosity of U2 makes my stomach churn. If the Anglicans really want to spice up their services they should invite princes William and Harry. They could potentially be the head of the church. They might as well use their influence to attract junior high American girls to the flock of Church of England devotees while they're still in their prime.

Somebody should call James Dobson, and see if he'd put George W.'s daughters on the payroll. Just think how righteous it would be to have the head of evangelicals and the head of the republican party solidify their relationship through a feudal exchange of offspring. I bet the Bush daughters could do some guest spots on Adventures in Odyssey and maybe put out a few books on what it's like to drink really hard in college and then sincerely repent so you can help your dad become President while securing for yourself a position that guarantees you won't have to lift a finger for the rest of your life.

"This week on Adventures in Odyssey: Jenna Bush takes a trip in the Imagination Station and learns that Jesus actually turned the water into grape juice at the wedding at Cana. Mr. Whitaker catches Barbara Bush stuffing the ballot box at Whit's End and has a stern talk with her about what Jesus thinks about cheaters."